Blood is thicker than water, isn’t it?

When a family holds strong, united, it’s a covalent bond that can’t be broken, but the moment there are cracks in the surface and the tear is apparent, has it become an ionic bond that can be easily broken and never fixed back again?

Back as a typical Singaporean

Wow… after close to 10 months here, I’m about to fly home to Singapore for my vacation. It feels surreal, yet at the same time I already know what Im going to do every day for the next few weeks – everything is planned, slotted into my agenda, flawless and impeccable, just like a typical Singaporean, as if I had never left.

I barely make plans more than a week ahead here in Buenos Aires, but like a true, busy, efficient Singapore girl, I know how important time is to everyone else on the island nation, so a month before flying off, I had done all my prep work and sent out emails asking my friends when they would be free to meet up. It’s amazing how easily I slip back into SG-mode, even after being so accustomed to life here in BA. It’s as easy as flipping the switch on and off the sleep mode for your iPhone.

Knowing I’m going home to visit, but also knowing that I will be back in BA in a few weeks, is like having two homes that you love equally, and now I get to be with both.

Am so terribly excited to see all my friends, my family, give them their gifts, tell them exotic Latin American stories of fiestas and chicos lindos, and to hear all the updates in their lives and in Singapore over the past 10 months. I am wondering how I’m going to react to being back home and witnessing the change in the landscape (particularly the view of Marina Bay and the newly-sprouted buildings and Integrated Resorts, and bitching about life in our very broken English and Singlish, and delighting in our heavenly local cuisine.

I have also made plans for a holiday from my holiday – so it won’t feel as if my vacation is spent only at home in Singapore – and for the Chinese New Year weekend, my family and I will be headed to Hong Kong! YES! Hong Kong! after the long 1-year hiatus since I last went there (to eat and eat and shop, duh! what else? Especially since that is the way the HK tourism board markets its country).

So many thoughts and plans – almost couldn’t sleep the last two nights thinking about returning to SG, meeting my friends and aunties with their newborn angels, and just catching up on the time that has passed us by. Oh yes, and did I mention that my new domestic helper Fitri also has massaging abilities??? I sure didn’t see that in her CV!! YAY!

Am so glad to be flying back. More tales soon.

xoxo.

Rainbow after the storm

This is the view from my office .. After an exhausting day at work, I turned around and saw this miracle!

Reversing the Lost Generation

Most people today have their lives defined in the following manner, and they live the mantra below –

I am part of a lost generation
and I refuse to believe that
I can change the world
I realize this may be a shock but
“Happiness comes from within.”
is a lie, and
“Money will make me happy.”
So in 30 years I will tell my children
they are not the most important thing in my life
My employer will know that
I have my priorities straight because
work
is more important than
family
I tell you this
Once upon a time
Families stayed together
but this will not be true in my era
This is a quick fix society
Experts tell me
30 years from now, I will be celebrating the 10th anniversary of my divorce
I do not concede that
I will live in a country of my own making
In the future
Environmental destruction will be the norm
No longer can it be said that
My peers and I care about this earth
It will be evident that
My generation is apathetic and lethargic
It is foolish to presume that
There is hope.

And all of this will come true unless we choose to reverse it .

Now, if we read the poem the other way around, it will be like this:

There is hope .
It is foolish to presume that
My generation is apathetic and lethargic.
It will be evident that
My peers and I care about this earth
No longer can it be said that
Environmental destruction will be the norm
In the future
I will live in a country of my own making
I do not concede that
30 years from now, I will be celebrating the 10th anniversary of my divorce
Experts tell me
This is a quick fix society
but this will not be true in my era
Families stayed together
Once upon a time
I tell you this
family
is more important than
work
I have my priorities straight because
My employer will know that
they are not the most important things in my life
So in 30 years I will tell my children
“Money will make me happy.”
is a lie, and
“Happiness comes from within.”
I realize this may be a shock but
I can change the world
and I refuse to believe that
I am part of a lost generation.

Great minds often face strong opposition from weak minds

Stole this quote off my cousin Jon’s profile page. He’s definitely one of those great minds, who undoubtedly will go extremely far, burning boundaries and marking spaces where no other has before set limits.

These are the people who inspire, who remind us of what is worth pondering about rather than wasting precious ticking minutes on transitionary problems. These are the type of humans I have always wanted to be associated with, not those whose minds are filled solely with the problems of today, and cannot see with their hearts because they have built a fortress of selfish ambition and inward-lookingness around it.

I realized that for every thing, there is a solution, and what seems impossible today, may just be commonplace tomorrow, as technological evolution has proven so blatantly. The way we live our lives are dependent mainly on our minds and how we think, where we set the lines and tell ourselves this is possible, this is not. But beyond merely what we tell ourselves, the most fundamental reason why some surpass and others fall behind, is what we allow ourselves to think. The Mind is such a powerful tool to bring you to ambition, love, happiness or pain, sorrow and faithlessness.

This is how our world has continually progressed, how each generation outshines the other, and stuns their ancestors. This is the key to a life well-fulfilled. This is what I’m trying to do. This will be my mindset.

Make it yours as well.

Yes, love is still the greatest of all.

The only thing that can deal with human errors and faults, the only thing that can surpass conflict among people and stare hate in the face and return kindness, goodness and love, must be something that is bigger than all our problems and the current state of upset we are in. This verse is something I grew up with, lived with, but now cling onto to, for nothing else can help you deal with a situation of animousity and unkindness except for God’s love.

Love is patient; love is kind
and envies no one.
Love is never boastful, nor conceited, nor rude;
never selfish, not quick to take offense.
There is nothing love cannot face;
there is no limit to its faith,
its hope, and endurance.
In a word, there are three things
that last forever: faith, hope, and love;
but the greatest of them all is love.

– 1 Corinthians 13

Feeling the blues

It’s one of those days when the day at the office just drags u down. But some orange juice and bitching with my friend is sure to cheer me up!

Thank you for raising me the way you did

Dear Mummy & Daddy,

I think I’ve never even written the both of you a letter like this before. Well, I never had a reason too, since I was never so far away from home for so long a time.

I guess there is a lifetime of things that I could write about, and that I could thank you for, but that wouldn’t be most accurately captured in just some words on a screen. Well, both of you were the ones who gave me life, so first of all thank you for that. I guess like all kids, I grew up comparing what I had with others, the house I lived in, the family I grew up in, and it was always tough trying to figure out why there would always be someone else who had a nicer bag, and nicer house, and even cooler parents who let them do whatever they wanted.

A memory of me asking you why you weren’t like someone else’s parents is stuck in my mind as I write this to you – I remember Daddy being furious and saying never to compare my family with anyone else, whether it was in terms of wealth or looks or simple they way they were. I remember thinking it was just an excuse for not being what I wished you were.

Along the path of growing up, I remember instances where I desperately found it so hard to understand why I never could be so frank and truthful with you -thank sometimes you guys were so awfully stern that I didnt want to confide anything with you at all. I remember there were really strong feelings of hurt and anger, and an emptiness when I saw how other friends could joke so openly with their parents and be like total friends, not strangers.

There were some specific instances where I needed another relative to intervene in our quarrels and misunderstandings, and those moments I thought thoughts that I never want to think about again. But I guess gone are those times, because now that I am so far away from home, I feel closer to you both than ever before. Rare as it sounds, we email alot more nowadays, and I think I know much more about what’s going on in your life than I had ever did. We exchange emails on almost a daily basis, when we never used to say more than “hello” back home. Perhaps absence really makes the heart grow fonder.

However, more than the mere frequency of emails we have now, staying with another family and being overseas has shown me the importance of the foundation I have growing up. The values I learnt from you both always remind me how fortunate I am. That although we may not be as close as other families, family unity is always a top priority for you. I remember the tough conversation we had this year when you guys came to Argentina to visit me – when we were in Calafate and I said stuff that hurt you both, but rather than react and explode at me, you chose to stay calm and sit us all together and say a little prayer.

I think about the times when Mummy you would prepare all the goodies and vitamins for me to bring here to Argentina plus a ton of other non-essential stuff so I would not be in lack – and I feel so thankful because not every parent would bother about such things for a daughter that is already 25 and decided to go live overseas on her own. I think about how you guys always try to keep in touch nowadays and despite some one-liner conversations, it always feels good to hear your voices.

Thank you for all you have given to me, and done for me to make me the person I am. I’m so proud to have you as my parents.

Love,
me.

Holiday season-correlated homesickness.

I was writing a Christmas card for my family when I started feeling the onset of homesickness, combined with a not-so-fantastic day at work. It’s one of those days when u feel like u need to be at home most, but everyone’s busy doing their own thing.

Some tears did a bit of good – guess I’m slighty better now. I do miss home alot still though.

Chinese roots

Listening to Jay Zhou on grooveshark ignites memories of home, althought ive never been that much of a fan of his.

I guess its the fact that I’m listening to Chinese lyrics after such a long time of not speaking my mother tongue.

It’s quite comforting. I guess one never loses their roots, no matter how long they’ve been away from their culture and home.

I’m proud to be Chinese.