Discovery

Staring out of the window

Into the cloudy skies above the ledge

I think and pause, the anxiety coming into waves of peace.

A stretch of road I see before me, long and still.

I’m running, jogging slowly at first, then faster faster faster

I find myself running straight into the Judea desert again

A sight that’s always been with me since I first stepped into Israel 4 years ago.

 

I’m walking through the sand dunes, dust covering my bare feet

Sifting through my toes as I tread carefully, trying to grip the sand for fear of falling.

 

I had been looking down, my eyes downcast and overshadowed

By the dust that flicks in my hair, swirling in the wind.

I lift my eyes to the skies, and

For one moment, a really long moment, my heart is caught in my throat; I clench my fists and I gasp in awe

The view that just spread itself out before me had caught me completely unaware,

Swept me off my blistered feet, and for that long pause,

I forget the weariness that I had been carrying with me

I lay it down, like a bag of stones I had been dragging along unknowingly

 

Right above me is a long flow of dark, so dark that it’s gleaming and shining so bright it stings my eyes

I find myself trying to tear away from the magnetic pull of the unraveled velvet sky, and realize that it is impossible.

I search the dark, and then, as my eyes adjust to its glow,

What I see touches my heart so much I cry.

 

I thought I was alone, then I saw a flicker.

Then another glimmer, then another spark that I didn’t see before.

Shiny metal and diamonds start making their guest appearances.

 

I am caught off guard, wide-eyed, stunned.

All my worries and my burdens suddenly seemed miniscule,

Upon the scale of heavens that had been suddenly and so majestically laid before me for my appreciation.

 

I see the world like never before. My eyes are opened to the possibilities there are, the much life that I had never noticed prior to that, prior to the time of being downcast and focusing on myself.

 

I find myself suddenly lifted like in Physics, because the pressure from below is so much stronger than the pressure from above. I am pushed upwards and I am soaring beyond my highest imagination.

I feel lighter, like helium, shooting past the sand dunes, looking down at the desert, my solace. I can’t stop flying; I can’t even if I tried. And I stop trying to stop, and let the wind keep me afloat, where I know I’ve found my peace.

 

Mannheim, Germany. 061207

 

desert solace

Maureen Wheeler, wife of Tony wheeler, the lovely pair who set up the Lonely Planet Traveller book business, commented in their latest book “The Lonely Planet Story”that,

some places find their way into your heart instantly.

For me, it is the desert. There is something magically peaceful about the desert which draws me to the sounds of the mighty winds at night, the vastness of its unseen territory, and the gentle knowing that calms me when I was there a few years back. Of the many places that I’ve had the luxury of travelling to, it is the Judea desert that captured my heart and has never let it go since. With the Middle East tension still much unsettled, I’m glad I went there while I had a chance to.

The one thing i can’t let go about the desert is its intensely captivating view; even of nothingness and horizons that stretch endlessly, or of the pure night sky sparkling with jewelled stars, untainted by any city lights that might mar its awesome paranomic view. My most striking memory of such a lovely place was atop a hill of mostly rocks, sitting there and doing my quiet time, while soaking in the beauty of the great masterpiece of God. It was a time where everything seemed to stop and pause in all their busy-ness, to gaze at the majestic glory that was painted for all who had the time to see.

Most importantly, it was a time away from the cares which bog us down daily, and make us forget to trust in Him. In the desert, I could feel His presence, and His being, and I remember feeling so proud and touched to be there that I teared.

The dry lands and sandy stretches often scare people away, but inside it is a land thriving with life and a haven for Bedouins. It is their way of life, their only understanding of home and comfort. More than any other thing, it represents the place where God gave the Israelites manna when they had no food, and the place where he sculpted their patience. The desert holds great significance both biblically and physically, making up great amounts of land on the map. Yet we know so little of it, and so much remains to be understood.

I think, more than anything, I want to go back to the same spot where I was in June 2004, to re-experience the same thrill in my soul, and to gather new revelations and fresh thoughts. I believe that all deserts have their secrets, their stories to tell, and the lands which hold their oasis and teem with life beneath the breathtaking nightsky are just waiting for people to tell their stories to.