Where You Lead Me, I will follow

Mercy Me– Undone, “Where you lead me”

What is life?
A thousand roads, a thousand ways
Why am I so afraid to move
I crossed the line
I’m stepping out so come what may
I give it all cause I’m drawn to You

As long as my heart is beating…
Where You lead me I will follow
Where You lead me I give my life away
Where You lead me I will follow
Forever and a day
Forever and a day

I can’t deny Your very presence is my life
And why would I ever turn away
Cause deep inside I know that I cannot rely
On anything less than faith

As long as my heart is beating…
Where You lead me I will follow
Where You lead me I give my life away
Where You lead me I will follow
Forever and a day

This is all I’m dreaming of
To live completely in Your love

So this is life

Where You lead me I give my life away
Where You lead me I will follow
Forever and a day

Where You lead me I will follow
Where You lead me I give my life away
Where You lead me I will follow
Forever and a day
Forever and a day

And why you asked.

Ah, ask me why I have yet to post countless pictures and brag about my travels; ask me why I refuse to string a whole line of shots taken at cathedrals and other statues compiled with prose that shout of my joy at having been there, ask me why and I will tell you, because I don’t see the meaning in doing so.

I know I promised to write about the places I have visited and the places I hope to visit; that I will give you their history and their significance; but now I somehow feel that reason completely falls apart; torn at its perforated seams, unable to stand on its own, and therefore not worth an entry unless its existence is etched so sharply and deeply into my heart.

Instead, I write about the country I now call home, albeit twisting the meaning of home a little. I write about my living here; the people who I have newly founded as friends, the space that is undeniably my own yet also not entirely so; and the way I have to learn a totally foreign language from scratch, dissolving me from a person typically confident of her language skills to one stuttering in class, unsure and inconfident of her pronunciation.

It is difficult; if not very very extremly hard to be learning a language that I have no prior knowledge of; which is one of the bases of foundation of the English language; a laguage of copied mish-mash phrases, a language that I used to be proud that I was good at. Now I feel like a young child all over again, learning the alphabets, learning the german words for “swim”, “eat”, “day”. I refuse to take a simpler A1,1 german class so that I will be forced and thrown into the deep end; leaving me no choice but to learn to swim or drown. I hope it is the former.

Time passes too quickly here; as always, my sentimental natures screams for it to come to a hidden standstill, to crystalize the beautiful memories that I’m making everyday; to hold them in such fragile glass that keep them safe. No amount of pictures can encapsulate these jewels; no phrase can translate their beauty.

I suppose these things are things almost eternal; you bury them in your core memory and never let them go. I know I won’t. So ask me why again, ask me why I don’t post those pretty pictures that I horde on facebook, and I will tell you why; they dont make the cut.

In a bier garten; Prost!

The more I learn about other cultures, the greater the mountain of my lack in knowledge. I am constantly amazed, appalled, and flabbergasted at the many similarities and even greater differences in Germany’s culture and countless systems. What I thought was so called German efficiency has been wiped away by the windscreens of clearer understanding to portray the view of a bureaucratic country whose disjointed systems and inflexible rules make both foreignors and locals especially frustrated.

Everything has to be done following a rule book that seems to be unable to adjust to circumstances of adversity and which most call for its being elastic. In this huge land which is powerful in the EU and has made its mark (good or bad, up to you) in my history textbooks, the older generation of germans are particularly anal and lacking in understanding when it comes to foreignors like us exchange students being unable to speak its national language.

It gets particularly hard to be efficient in a country whose pride in its language and disdain for English as a second class and diluted lauguage (the truth of which I do not dispute) makes foreignors feel uneasy. This strikes most commonly in the offices of government officials and anywhere which requires administration. It irks me even more when you are in a an office meant for visa extension (which is supposed to be international) and they derive pleasure in making you shift uncomfortably in your shoes by their obstinate refusal to speak in English, a language that they can speak pretty well.

In other areas where German efficiency is expected, such as for a bank as renouned as Deutsche Bank, my PIN number for my bank card takes practically forever (ok, that was an exaggeration)–almost a month is more accurate– to come. Up till now, it has been 4 weeks since i have applied for the card, 3 weeks since i have received the bank card, and yet i still have yet to receive the PIN number which enables me access to the money sitting in the account. This is so terribly annoying and if I were not such an incredibly patient and easy-going person, I would have made my point known by visiting the Bank and demanding for my PIN.

Even the locals here berade us foreignors with their endless complaints of the inefficiency of the German government officials, who apparently are paid to do nothing, and all they do to keep their iron rice bowl is to go to work in the morning, read the papers, sip some coffee, wait for time to pass, and once they hit the 8 hr and 12 min mark each “werktag”(literally translated as workday), they head out of the office, pleased to be part of the elite workforce which cannot be fired unless they do something terribly disturbing.

I am still trying to learn more about the country that I chose to live in for the next 4 months (well, more accurately 3.5 months), but till I next post, here has been my weekly update; photos are all on facebook (if you do not have a facebook account, I’m not about to post my pictures here for your convenience; its way too difficult).

But just for some updates; here are my travelling plans:
This weekend: I’m headed to Bad Durkheim for the oldest and largest Winefest in the world — “WurstMarkt”
Next thurs-sun: I should be travelling to Zurich with Faye and Ray and then touring switzerland for the second time!
28th-30th Sept: First week @ Oktoberfest, Munich. Can you believe i woke up at 5 am this morning to queue up at 6 am for tickets to go with Vissum, the organization in Uni Mannheim that takes care of exchange students)? I still cant belive it myself, but the plan is that for the 90 euros I paid, I get to bus up to Munich for maybe 7-8 hours and then sleep in tents for 2 nights in sleeping bags. I hope that works for me and that I wont catch the cold. It is approaching Autumn afterall.
The weekend after: Possibly training up to Prague to meet Hu!ying.
The weekendS after: Uncertain, but most certainly going to pack them with travelling plans, because once November hits, it’s going to be a tight school schedule.

Alright! There you go! Whoever’s reading this and happens to be going to the places im going, let me know so maybe we could do a coffee and a meetup! take care the rest of you guys in Singapore! I am most certainly missing you all alot! but i am also loving the fact that I am living away from home in another country! Cheerios!

Protected: Such close proximity

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This dream come true

One week after arriving in Mannheim,

The roads look less strange and threatening;
The streets and shops start to take shape in my memory.
The sidelights begin their winding path
Into my comfort zone.

In this new country and new town,
I feel like I’m finally settling down.
With friends that I make newly everyday
It feels like home in more than one way.

This time away from home has made me realise
How many things I take for granted
And so much more that I didn’t know
Independence is freedom and thrill

The curve of the city has etched its mark
Onto my heart and its golden crust
Has softened the initial weariness
And lined my wandering mind.

Away from home and yet never that far
I’m reveling in this dream come true
A period of thinking and reflection
And reaching deep within.